SAVING money by buying the cheap imported version comes at a price, says XAVIER DUFF

I could hear Ken's voice bouncing off the shopfronts and down the street even before I'd got out of the car.

It was the monthly meeting of our informal think tank, which meets here in Eric's bar and solves the world's problems over a cold one.

I knew the topic even before I got a beer in front of me - Ken's pet subject, Chinese manufactured goods.

I thought he was talking about those Chinese-made utes that aren't too crash hot - literally, having scored a pretty ordinary two stars in crash testing.

But he was having a rant about a pump he had bought a fortnight ago that had been back to the shop twice after breaking down.

"Bloody thing. Wouldn't suck the dregs out of this glass," Ken said.

"Whatever happened to all the good Australian and British-made stuff you used to be able to buy?

"C'mon Ken. Get with it. That's old thinking," said Bob, who is the think tank's economic expert because he's the only one who stays awake to watch Lateline Business.

"No developed country makes its own stuff any more.

"You've got to hand it to China - the way they can ship raw materials from all over the world, make it into stuff and then send it back to be sold at a fraction of the price of locally made product."

"It'd be a miracle if any of it worked for more than five minutes," Ken said.

"But think of the thrill in being able to buy a wrench that once cost $50 for just $1.75," Bob said.

"I bought one of those," Joe chimed in from the end of the bar.

"The thread was buggered and the thing wouldn't even undo the twist top on me stubby."

"I know how Ken feels," Eric, the publican, said.

"I've kept a list at home of all the Chinese-made stuff I've bought over the years that never worked.

"I've bought brooms with handles that broke off in the first week. I've got screwdrivers that can't drive and screws without threads.

"I've bought potato peelers that glide effortlessly over the spud without so much as a scratch.

"I've got batteries that lasted half an hour, occy straps that don't stretch, socks with holes that appeared after only two wearings, bags with broken zippers and adhesive hooks that wouldn't hold a feather."

"So that's why you should only buy trusted Australian brands," said Frank.

"Well that's no guarantee - most of them are made in China as well," Ken said.

'"The only Australian content is the crane driver who unloads the containers from Shanghai."

"What are you worried about anyway, Ken?" Bob asked.

"The mega hardware hyperstore will replace it, under their money-back guarantee. Tradies do it all the time."

"Yeh, but you're only ending up with same dodgy product that's bound to suffer the same fate."

Joe chuckled: "So instead of a tool that lasts a lifetime, you get a lifetime's supply of tools."

"Except, the day my purchase gives up the ghost is usually the day after the warranty expires," Ken grumbled.

"Anyway it's false economy," he continued.

"A week ago I had to fix a flat tyre and decided to buy a new tube rather than faff around patching it. If there's one thing worse than Chinese-made inner tubes, it's Chinese puncture-repair kits."

"So I put the Chinese tube in, pumped it up and 10 minutes later it was flat.

"Eventually I managed to track down someone who made a tube that could withstand more than a breath of air.

"It cost four times the Chinese brand, but after taking into account the week's work I lost chasing around, not to mention the three tanks of petrol running to and from the shops, it was a steal."

"Which brings me to my point," Ken continued.

"The cheapness of Chinese-made goods is an illusion, because nothing lasts and you have to keep replacing it. They say consumers are the winners, but we really are the bunnies."

"The Chinese economic miracle is just a plan to keep us on the consumer-spending treadmill."

With that gripe finally off his chest, Ken put down his glass.

"Give us another beer, will you, Eric - at least I know that's Australian-made and won't break down on me."

"Err, sorry the beers seem to have gone warm," Eric said sheepishly.

"Must be that new Chinese chiller I bought."

Everyone groaned.

"Don't worry, it's still under warranty," Eric said.

"I'll pop down to the dealer tomorrow and get a new one. Cup of tea, anyone?"

Xavier Duff is a senior Weekly Times reporter.