Hugs Team honours Adam's life

THE tragic death of a teenager has inspired family and friends to reach out to people in a simple way.

When an acquired brain injury (ABI) from a car accident led to the tragic death of Bendigo teenager Adam Kilner, his family and friends wanted to honour his life.

His father, Noel, and friends, including Hamish Riley, set out to gain support for those affected by the condition with a unique foundation.

"Noel told me he wanted to start this foundation to ensure Adam would be remembered," says Hamish.

"Straight away I knew I wanted to be a part of it."

The result was the Have a Hug Foundation, created by Noel and his son's friends to honour the memory of Adam, who died in January last year.

Officially launched at a free concert in Bendigo earlier this year, the foundation has been working to highlight the plight of those affected by ABI, raise money and generally promote the need to cherish life.

And this month, on December 17, Noel, Hamish and Adam's other family and friends will descend on the Bourke St Mall in Melbourne to share their own Christmas message as part of the Hugs Team.

"Basically, we'll be walking through the mall and the city giving hugs to people," says the 19-year-old. "We don't go too much into the detail of ABI and Adam, because it just gets too emotional for us.

"It's what Adam would have wanted. He was a real free spirit and so this is about trying to make people less serious and have more fun, to realise material things are not so important, that friends and family and loved ones are important."

With a shared flair for mischief in the classroom, Hamish became friends with Adam at secondary school.

He says Adam was never the same after he was hit by a car in 2006 and diagnosed with ABI.

"At first he couldn't walk or talk but gradually he began to relearn these basic things.

"He was different but you could tell he was still Adam, he still had a great sense of humour."

After watching a video on YouTube of a man giving out hugs, Adam was inspired to do the same.

"He just said, 'I want to do that'," Hamish says.

"It was Christmas time and Adam thought that Christmas was getting too commercialised and people were forgetting what was important."

So Adam headed to Bourke St to hand out hugs.

And after Adam's death, his father took up the idea as the basis for the foundation.

Now, each year on December 17, the foundation plans to hold Have a Hug day, the anniversary of Adam's Free Hugs campaign.

Hamish says the free concert earlier this year - held to commemorate the first anniversary of Adam's passing - raised more than $900 and he was inundated with people wanting to help with Have a Hug.

At Easter, the foundation built a special float for the Bendigo Easter Parade.

Hamish has a deep respect for Noel and how he has approached his son's death.

"Noel is so brave, the way he gets up and talks about Adam, I wouldn't be able to do that if I had been through what he has.

"He is a diamond in the rough."

He says aside from the work of the foundation, the impact of his friend's death has changed his life.

"I can't speak for everyone else, but I have changed a lot. I was pretty arrogant and self-obsessed before. Now I do more community work. It's made me wiser.

"It's brought everyone closer and made me appreciate my friends - and others - and life more. In my career (as an insurance officer at Bendigo Bank in Bendigo) I'm more goal oriented."

While his teenage compatriots make headlines each weekend for their raucous, drunken and often criminal behaviour, Hamish says Adam's death has even changed his approach to alcohol and partying.

"I still have a drink with my mates, but I've cut down on my drinking. I don't go clubbing anymore, I've pulled back heaps and when I see a fight about to happen, I just talk to my mates or walk away. It's just not worth putting your life at risk."

CHECKLIST
• The Have a Hug Foundation will be giving out free hugs in the Bourke St Mall, Melbourne, from 10am, December 17. Details: www.haveahug.org

ON SEPTEMBER 9 2006, just nine days short of his 17th birthday, Adam Kilner was struck by a four-wheel-drive vehicle as he crossed the road near his Bendigo home and sustained traumatic head injuries.

He was flown to Melbourne's Alfred Hospital and was not expected to survive.

He lay in a coma for seven weeks, eventually regaining consciousness, but remained in a vegetative-like state.

After seven months of rehabilitation, he was allowed to go home, walking, talking, but suffering ABI. This eventually led to his death in January 2008.

ABI refers to any type of brain damage that occurs after birth and can include damage sustained by infection, disease, lack of oxygen or a blow to the head.

According to Adam's family, the effects and outcomes of ABI are still mostly a mystery.