DEAR Agnes, I'm the manager of a country footy club and after last week's storm over Storm, I'm a bit worried.
I have to confess I've been giving our top players a meat tray after each game provided by our major sponsor, Kev the butcher.
No cash has changed hands but have I still breached our salary cap? I'm really worried they are going to take away our 2009 Wooden Spoon - then what will we serve the club dinner with on Thursday nights?
Worried, Woop Woop West
Dear Worried,
I'm sure you're not the only footy administrator this week sweating over whether those extra sausage rolls they slipped their top players at the trivia night constitutes a breach of the salary cap.
We all know how hard it is in country footy to get good players - well let's face it any players - so it's understandable clubs want to offer some inducements.
But what start as a few extra oranges at half time and a couple of Happy Meal vouchers after training soon escalates.
Before you know it, you are offering the club president's Holden Statesman for dates and promising exotic end-of-season trips to places such as Yarrawonga and Merimbula.
But it doesn't matter whether it's half a dozen stubbies or a suitcase of cash, rules are rules and you can't be just a little bit illegal.
So I suggest you 'fess up and take your punishment on the chin.
And look on the bright side - if you lose your wooden spoon, you'll have another one by the end of this season.
Agnes
