I WAS upset to hear there will be no poultry at the Royal Melbourne Show because MasterChef has taken over the chook pavilion.
The main reason I go to the show is to see a good Leghorn.
What's next? Will Dancing With the Stars bump the Garryowen out of the arena?
Could Australia's Next Top Model push out the beef carcass competitions?
Or perhaps even the production of Play School could mean no more animal nursery?
Yes it would be terrible to see the chooks go from the Show.
A Show without chooks is like a Show without showbags or a Show without a giant inflatable novelty toy or a Show without the battered hot dog on a stick. ( I'd like to see those MasterChefs come up with a finer culinary creation than that masterpiece.)
Mind you, there are some things I would be happy to go without at the Show.
I mean, what sort of example are we setting our young drivers allowing those chaps in the HiLux utes to drive like hoons around the arena? You'd have your ute impounded if you did that anywhere else.
But the chooks are an extremely important part of the Show.
I mean, where else can you go these days to see a Transylvanian Naked Neck or a Buff Orpington or those cute little silky bantams which look like a powder puff with a beak?
But don't despair. I've heard the poultry competition will still go on - it will just be somewhere else on the showgrounds.
In fact, the further away from the MasterChef kitchen the better I reckon, and I believe our feathered friends might agree.
The last thing we want is for someone's prize Light Sussex ending up in a lightly charred chicken-choko combo with a feral fennel fricassee.