Last Updated: September 05, 2015

Weather: Canberra 0°C - 17°C . Partly cloudy.

Monster pumpkin takes over

HOW’s this for an inspired use of pumpkins that doesn’t involve roasting them or making soup.

Laughing gear: Duck walks into a pub

Laughing gear: Duck walks into a pub
A DUCK walks into a pub and asks: “Got any bread?”

It’s Gavin’s taller twin

It’s Gavin’s taller twin
YOU could never accuse Gavin Phillips of being a cardboard cutout — except, of course, when he is one.

RSPCA calls in gun shearer

RSPCA calls in gun shearer
The RSPCA has called in a top shearer to trim a sheep that evaded a haircut so long its life may have been in danger.

Buzz light years ahead

Buzz light years ahead
HERE’s a job guaranteed to make you go cross-eyed.

Dear Agnes: Paper problem

Dear Agnes: Paper problem
DEAR Agnes, I was in a public toilet recently and went to tear off some toilet paper.

Ewe can’t do better

Ewe can’t do better
RECENTLY we showed you how to make the most out of nature.

Crop covered, butt busted

Zero till demonstration day at Pine Grove
HERE’s proof builder’s bum is not just a tradie’s occupational hazard.

Laughing gear: Jake the inventor

Laughing gear: Jake the inventor
JAKE was an inventor who had devised a good early version of a high-tech watch.

Nowhere’s to and fro

Nowhere’s to and fro
IT’S all very well knowing how to get somewhere, but where are we now?

Leap of faith on horse

Leap of faith on horse
WE DIDN’T know that vaulting horse was a term that could be used literally.

Best by halves

BACK PADDOCK 1/2 kilometer sign at Nandaly
GOOD to see fractions haven’t gone out of fashion at VicRoads.

Ask Agnes: Meat-eater

Ask Agnes: Meat-eater
DEAR Agnes, I’ve always been a fan of cheap cuts of meat.

Esmeralda says it’s quiltin’ time

Esmeralda says it’s quiltin’ time
NOLA Williams from Lancaster in central Victoria sent in this picture of her funny gateway adornment.

Laughing gear: Dad and Dave

Laughing gear: Dad and Dave
DAD and Dave head down to the Big Smoke to go to the Royal Show.

Olive warps idea of leading

Olive warps idea of leading
”IT’S just a jump to the left. And then a step to the right.”

Take 200 on that shot

Take 200 on that shot
HOW long does it take to make a 45- second TV commercial?

Ask Agnes: Sneezing man

Ask Agnes: Sneezing man
DEAR Agnes, I was in the supermarket the other day and a man sneezed all over me and the tomatoes

Try the bullish approach

Try the bullish approach
“SO WHADDYA think of my new necklace girls? A bit of bling always helps lift a chap’s profile don’t ya reckon?”

Ewe know who fleeces punters

Ewe know who fleeces punters
“C’MON, Best Baa None, you can do it — two more seconds and we’ve got this in the bag.”

Laughing gear: Elderly couple

Laughing gear: Elderly couple
A LONG-married couple managed to get by because they watched their pennies.

Hay there, prickly customer

Hay there, prickly customer
DAVE Sharp, from Scotsburn, feared the worst while feeding some sheep recently when he felt a sharp sting.

Caravanners have Wales of time

Farmers Weekly - Royal Welsh Show 2015.
LOOK! Over there! Is it a forage harvester? Is it a tiger? Is it a Holstein cow? No! It’s a caravan!

Ask Agnes: Hoarder for a hubby

Ask Agnes: Hoarder for a hubby
DEAR Agnes, my husband is a hoarder.

Archibale Prize winner named

NEWS: Bonking Bales at Lake Charm
BRUCE Cook’s 50 Shades of Hay has taken out the inaugural Archibale Prize for best hay bale sculpture.

Demon’s leap of faith

Demon’s leap of faith
MT ELIZA’S Scott Lockwood did his best Superman impression leaping for a mark against Chelsea.

Laughing gear: Father and son

Laughing gear: Father and son
SON: Dad, how far will that plane fly?

Frisky young lambs at Hamilton

Sheepvention, Hamilton.
CRIKEY. What’s going on here at the wool fashion parade at Sheepvention in Hamilton?

Sod’s law spells dirty work

Sod’s law spells dirty work
IT’S a bit of a toss-up which is the more boring — a ribbon cutting or a sodturning ceremony.

Hey, bale art is everywhere

Hey, bale art is everywhere
LOOKS like farmers all over the world love a bit of hay bale art.
Weekly Times Back Paddock

More from our partners

Going south

Going south

EXCLUSIVE: CHINA will turn to South America if Australia backs away from a landmark trade agreement, NFF chief Simon Talbot says.

Salary cap’s big savings

Weekly Times Sherrin Footy

SOME Central Victorian AFL clubs could save up to$70,000 when the statewide salary cap comes into effect in 2017.

Bull sales charge up

Dunoon Angus sale Holbrook

MONTHS of stellar beef returns are being reflected in millions of dollars spent on bulls in the past week.

A farmer’s eye in the sky

A farmer’s eye in the sky

A NEW unmanned aerial vehicle allows farmers to check on what’s happening around their property.

Keeping farmers posted

Supplied Editorial

OUTBACK postie Dave Hammond has a mail run so long it is a tourist attraction.

Teasing rain not enough

Teasing rain not enough

THE Bureau of Meteorology’s rain forecast of 25-50mm for Victoria failed to arrive on Wednesday.